On Wednesday night, Derek Jeter went 3-4 at home against the Devil Rays and in so doing, tied Lou Gehrig's record for the most hits as a Yankee. This has led sports columnists and TV commentators to reflect on his career and gush about what a stellar athlete and stand-up personality he has been.
I would like to use this blog post to remind everyone that Derek Jeter is actually a big dork. I think all these sports people are overestimating Jeter now that the Yankees are no longer the loathed empire of MLB dominance. The Yanks have been choking since 2001 and now everyone feels sympathy for them.
I even have a friend who's an Orioles fan who by all rights should be a Yankee hater but confessed to me that he one day came to a realization that Jeter is "awesome." Dear friend, do not be blinded by the Yankee mystique. Here is some solid proof that Jeter is a dork and not awesome.
- If they kept stats of consecutive games with the same hairstyle, he would be the new Ironman
- He makes a living off of opposite-field hits and the short Yankee porch
- He sticks his butt out too much when he's up to bat and he always leans over the pitch when he watches it for a ball
- A 2008 study by researchers at the University of Pennsylvania found that, from 2002 through 2005, Jeter was the worst defensive shortstop in the Major Leagues
- The fist pump
- Doper - His homerun total went from 10 in 2003 to 23 in 2004
1 comment:
I never thought I would come to the defense of the baseball player I have hated the most over the last 15 years of baseball, but since I get called out in your blog I feel a duty to respond.
First, you are right, Jeter is a big dork. Maybe the biggest dork in the history of baseball except for like Gary Carter or Scott Brosius or Ozzie Smith. But he is an awesome big dork. I know this is true because the revelation I had that he is awesome was one of the strongest impressions I have ever had, and I can't deny it. It was kind of like the revelation I had this summer that Leonardo Dicaprio is awesome. These are two guys I have hated pretty much since the moment I knew they existed, but the truth is the truth, they are awsome at what they do. I am not blinded by the Yankee mystique, or the Red Sox mystique for that matter, or any mystique, and I can prove it because I am an Orioles fan. No mystique there. I was blinded by my utter dislike for Jeter, wanting to pull my fingernails out everytime I see him do the fist pump, or worse, slide onto second on a double and call time out in that pretty boy way and then pull up his pants and take off his batting glove while he looks around and makes that pretend strained face as if he really just exerted himself and he wants the millions of people looking at him to see the cool sports face he makes. I'm mad even thinking about this. In fact, one of my most enjoyable baseball experiences ever was following Jeter's massive slump at the beginning of 2004, checking the boxscore daily to make sure he went0-4 again. But, despite all this, I am ready to counter you on every point you make against Jeter to prove his awesomeness:
1. Jeter's hair is one of the top 10 most annoying things about him. But it's also a testament to his awesomeness and dedication to the game. He keeps a cut that requires no maintenance so he can concentrate on baseball during the game and with little effort move into his pimp mode after the game. This is in stark contrast to some player who try to keep a certain image as cool but their hair gets in the way of the game. Some Red Sox dorks come to mind. So does Brady Anderson.
2. Whatever, he knows how to get on base and win a game, and cares about doing it more than almost any player. That's awesome.
3. True -- but the great Ricky Henderson also did both of these things, if not moreso, and he was one of the most awesome players ever, so Jeter's in good company. Cal Ripken even stuck his butt way out for a couple of seasons, and he IS the awesomest player ever.
4. Um, I have no comeback for this one. I think you made it up.
5. I already addressed the fist pump, but let me just add that it is a sign of his intensity mixed with a boyish love for the game. I have caught myself on several occasions doing the fist-pump after a Crato strikeout or some other ultra satisfying wiffleball feat, haven't you? It was also the offical sign of the second ever wiffleball banquet and we have pictures of all the Gil Tyrees as of 2002 doing it, so if you are taking on Jeter on this one you are taking on your wiffle superiors. "Watch it, brother."
6. This accusation reminds me of the time I was accused of taking steroids by a cross-country teammate when I went from being a sucky runner who came in behind girls my freshman year to making the varsity team my sophmore year. I weighed a consistent 130 pounds both years (still do). Jeter and I did the same thing -- used the off-season to improve our game. A testament that we are both awesome.
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